I WAS STANDING outside a large house. It was almost like a university dormitory and I have no idea how I got there. It was so dark out that I couldn’t really make out the structure of the building either, but it seemed to be vast, rectangular, and have many windows. I had a small satchel full of coconuts with me and a machete. Don’t ask me how these came into my possession. My back was to the building, and I cut one of the coconuts open, and lifted it to drink its sweet water. Supposedly, this stuff is the healing elixir lifesource itself. Drink enough and you will be replenished. Instead, a kind of algal green slime poured forth. I let it run into the snow and could see the snow turn green. Fermented, I thought. Simply undrinkable.
From a basement level window, I could see steam puffing out, and when I peeked inside, I immediately saw a nude young woman. I stepped back, still holding my machete and coconuts, not wanting to get caught peeking, but then glanced through the window once more, and saw there were actually two women in there. One of them was straddling the other, and she was moaning. “Yes, yes, just like that,” she said. Maybe this was an all-woman’s dorm? I tried not to listen, but could not help but keep one ear focused. Why did these things keep happening to me? It’s not like I went around searching for showering lesbians. They found me all the same.
I pulled another coconut from my satchel and hacked off its top with my blade. To my surprise, it was actually two coconuts that had grown together, a kind of double-barrelled coconut, with two channels. The water was warm, sticky, sweet, refreshing, everything that coconut water was supposed to be and more. After draining both channels, I felt fully restored, and put the coconut in my bag for later consumption. The showering co-eds were still moaning downstairs, but I walked around the building, showed my pass, and went inside.
Down one hallway, I noticed stairs that led up to a computer lab. The room was dark, but all of the computer monitors were on. Esmeralda was sitting there, squinting at the screen. She was smiling. Esmeralda looked happy. Her brown hair was tied up in a bun, and she was wearing that dress she used to wear when she worked at the café. I thought she looked beautiful, with that special slope of her eyes. She really was such a beautiful girl. I didn’t want to disturb her. Esmeralda looked so happy sitting alone. Maybe someone else had sent her a love letter.
north! 